Day 37 - Part 2 - September 29, 2015

Jeff's day continued on to be a good one. He was less sleepy than usual and the good parts of his hands and arms didn't hurt. He still has weakness from the nerves being over stimulated and wasn't able to do as much as he wanted during therapy, but still managed to stay busy. The bottom half of him still burned with pins and needles all day.

In the afternoon Julee came and helped him write a letter to the hospital to tell them his thoughts. Basically, he is very pleased with the staff, but not pleased with how overworked and under paid they are. Patient care suffers when the unit is understaffed, and that's been his experience for most of his stay. 

They have a program called "Dear David" where patients can leave comments on a little 5x7 card for the hospital administration. His turned into 3 pages, typed. Jeff really cares about the hard working employees who work so hard every day to make a difference for their patients. He wants to bring attention to the injustices the employees and patients face when the unit is understaffed. 

Peggy got Jeff a wireless printer to hook up to his laptop and Ryan set it up this evening. The letter was printed and Jeff was able to maneuver his hands to hold it so he could read it through on his own with help flipping through the pages. 

His pointer fingers and thumbs still have the most sensation. His middle fingers have slight sensation and no movement, and his ring and pinky fingers have none of either. Tonight, when the paper touched any of his fingers besides the thumb or pointer it was painful. More of that hypersensitive/tingly sensation. We are crossing our fingers that this is a good sign! 

Before Annette left she helped get Jeff ready for bed with his boots and leg massagers. Everything she does is done so carefully and with so much tenderness. You can feel the love she has for our dad in every action she does from feeding him to hygiene cares. 

She left the hospital at 6:30pm, the earliest she's ever left, in order to have dinner with her parents Clifton and Joyce Green. She has only seen them once since the accident and needed that time with them. You could hear the emotion in her voice just talking about how much she missed them. 

Ryan stayed at the hospital tonight to keep Jeff company until bedtime. Julee left at the same time as Annette to care for their kids. 

Jeff had Johnathan as his nurse tonight, who he really likes. Unfortunately his wife got into a car accident and he had to leave. The charge nurse, who he also likes, took over as Jeff's nurse for now. We pray everything goes well for Johnathan and his family at this time! 

Several visitors came tonight. Jeff really enjoyed seeing them all and being able to talk to them. He wishes he had more time to devote to each person who visits. It's more realistic to just ask everyone who comes to set a time to come again when you can manage it. 

Perry Jones, an old biking buddy of Jeff's, came today. While he was there he told us he will do the tile for Jeff's new bathroom. We are so grateful for his kindness and support! 

Jody Hall also came to visit. He served with Jeff in the Elder's Quorum for several years in the past and is a good friend. 

Dan Aubrey, an old neighbor and friend, also took the time to come see Jeff. His son is Jeff's current bishop.

And Max Nielson, also an old friend and biking companion, dropped in. His visit was cut short due to time restraints, but Jeff enjoyed seeing him also.

We are so grateful to everyone who takes time out of their busy schedules to come spend time with our dad. He is so uplifted and energized after talking with old friends and family members. It's almost a form of therapy as he tells his story and bears his testimony over and over. 

If we ever miss putting your name on this blog please know it's not intentional and we are grateful for you too! You can contact Brandi or Julee to have your name added to the day you came. We want this record to remind us of everyone who stopped in. 

Sometimes important details get left out while transcribing, writing, or editing. It's important to us to try and recognize everyone who has shown us support and even share their contribution when appropriate. It's a small way for us to show how grateful we are for all of you and to remember what you've done to help our dad and our family during this trial.

Day 36 & 37 - Part 1 - September 28 & 29, 2015

Because of some unexpected events at work last night Julee was unable to get updates from Jeff and Annette until this morning. This update will be for yesterday and last night because, as it turns out, last night was incredible for Jeff and it dominated the conversation! 

Jeff started by saying, "Yesterday was okay, except it was a crazy nerve day."

His lower trunk was tingly and felt like it was on fire all day! It was the worst from his lower stomach and down, but most intense in his feet. 

The bottom side, or dead parts, of his arms felt much like his legs. The good part of his arms and fingers were hypersensitive and it was almost painful to touch things. Because all of his nerves were firing on their own Jeff lost a lot of his strength and wasn't able to push himself in the wheelchair. 

The doctor said, "I don't know what to tell you. It's definitely something. We'll just have to wait and see."

While we don't want to get our hopes up, we are cautiously optimistic that this means something. It's a change! We've kind of speculated that perhaps it's similar to when your hand falls asleep and then wakes back up, but obviously much more intense and painful. 

Jeff says he'll put up with the pain without complaint if he could just know things are beginning to heal and that's what is causing it. But the idea of having this pain for no reason? It bothers him to think that way. We are praying the first option is right. 

They did spend a lot of time working on the manual wheelchair to get it to work better for Jeff. They have put a lot of time into making adjustments because there isn't another chair for him to try on the unit. 

Irony of the day, the wheelchair Jeff is planning to buy has a titanium frame and spinergy wheels just like his mountain bike! He expects it to take months of fighting with the insurance to get coverage for most of it. 

Last night Josh Lloyd stayed for the evening. Jeff said he had a great time talking to him and looking at things with him. We are so grateful for his presence in our dad's life, he has made such a difference! 

Jeff says that last night was his 3rd night with the CPAP and that it worked perfectly and stayed in place all night. He went to sleep at 10pm and says, "I had a very good dream, conscience, direction, planning, thinking, confirmation session!"

In the past he used to complain about dreaming because he wouldn't ever remember them and wouldn't rest as well when he had them. His experiences with dreams have been much different since the accident, starting with that very first night. 

While not all of his dreams mean something, he definitely feels the Spirit has communicated with him at times while he's sleeping. Last night was like that. 

He says, "It was a state of conscious rest. It wasn't like regular dreaming or being awake. I thought about the future and planned things I know I can accomplish and things I know will happen."

He broke the night into three parts. The first part was about the future after he gets home. What will come to pass. He felt very uplifted and inspired from this part. 

The second part focused on what is going to take place in the following week. He came up with new features and improvements he'd like to see on his wheelchair that no one else has yet. He hopes to remember everything for when the wheelchair rep comes next week so he can tell him what's in his mind to custom make his wheelchair. He believes his ideas could help improve all wheelchairs and make them safer to use. 

Jeff then woke up at 1:30 this morning thinking the night was over. His eyes were filled with salt crystals from crying in his sleep. The CPAP pressure causes at least twice the amount of tears when you cry. He knows he cried at least three times because he remembers his nose getting clogged three times and being unable to breathe with the CPAP on until he calmed his emotions and it cleared up. 

He wasn't sure what time it was when he woke up so he moved his CPAP mask up on the bridge of his nose so he could push his button and ask for the time. He can't talk with the mask on. Moisture built up in the mask and overflowed into his eyes which helped clear them of the salt. He said it was awesome!

He was able to fall back to sleep and had a very restful sleep until 5:30am. He reports that it was the best night he's had since being there and said, "You can't have that experience and get a good night's rest without it being the best night ever!"

The respiratory therapist poked her head in and since he was already awake he invited her in to visit. They had a great 40 minute talk about life, raising children, and the gospel. She's a strong member of the church with 7 kids and Jeff says she's a "super mom".

He says the last couple days have been better as far as daytime drowsiness is concerned. We are attributing that to better sleep and are grateful they got things figured out with the CPAP. 

He says it costs just as much to rent it for one night as it does to buy a machine. He plans to purchase one soon, but since the money the insurance is paying to rent one goes directly to the respiratory therapy department for new machines and parts, etc, he's going to take his time choosing one to help them out a little. 

He's still having a couple residual problems from the UTI and we hope they will continue to resolve over time. 

Jeff was definitely inspired last night. He is more full of life than ever and very optimistic about his future, no matter what it holds for him. 

He expressed excitement that the unit is fully staffed today for the first time in weeks. He is looking forward to getting to know the people caring for him better and hopeful that they will have more time to spend with him than usual. This is his favorite part of life right now. He loves to learn about others and take the opportunity to be a missionary. 

As of this morning his lower body still feels lit up (on fire) from his stomach to his feet. The dead part of his arms still have the same spark feeling also. The good news is that the live part of his arms are no longer hypersensitive at this point. He hopes to have an easier time in therapy today. 

More to follow tonight, thank you all for tuning in and checking how things are going! We appreciate all your love and support! 

Day 35 - September 27, 2015

Today was a relaxing day for Jeff and Annette. He didn't have occupational therapy and physical therapy was pretty light. After a restful morning he did more work with his manual wheelchair. He practiced transfers into and out of it and then pushed it in the halls again. 

The 12th floor is a large rectangle. The north side is where the therapy gym is located and the east and west sides both have entrances into the gym. He exited one door and did the entire horseshoe to enter through the other door in 3 minutes and 33 seconds! That's amazing considering he can't use his hands and one of the wheels is having troubles that won't be fixed until tomorrow.

He was then able to nap between several interruptions. Annette says she misses the naptime from 2:00-3:30pm at Denver Health because no one was allowed to bother them during that time and naps were more restful. 

They were able to watch a movie after his nap, The Age of Adeline, which they both enjoyed. 

They noticed a big difference between his urine this morning to tonight. The antibiotics are heavy duty and only for three days, but they are definitely working already! He's also been drinking the cranberry juice throughout the day that Annette brought him.

The secretary of the Elder's Quorum in their ward, Kim Cannon (sp?), and his son Andrew came to visit today. They are Jeff and Annette's home teachers. We are grateful they took the time to drop by, Jeff and Annette really enjoyed the visit! 

Jay and Peggy also came to spend time with them. They dedicate so much time in and out of the hospital to our mom and dad and we are so thankful for all they do! 

While Jeff reports that he really liked the new CPAP machine and says it was much better, he still had a difficult night. He was hurting a lot more and couldn't get comfortable. He finally took another pain pill and got a little bit of much needed sleep. 

When Annette left him tonight he was going through emails before bed. We are glad he had a relaxing day and pray that tonight will be much better so he'll be ready for a full day tomorrow.

Day 34 - September 26, 2015

Today was a very busy day at Jeff's home. Randy, Terren, Ryan, Blake, and Josh Lloyd all got together to tear out the front bathroom and expanded it into what used to be the office closet. They even let Jaxon bend the old nails over with a hammer so he could feel useful. Roxane contributed by saving Annette's entrance rug that the men didn't think to move and providing a shop vac for the clean up.

Because Zach was out helping his dad on the muzzleloader hunt today he came earlier in the week, on Wednesday to do some initial demo. He removed the toilet, counter top, and the vanity so they'd be out of the way and safe from the demolition crew.

This coming Monday Kameron, Jeff's nephew & the family plumber, will be meeting Randy there to discuss how they are going to move the pipes and rebuild the bathroom to make it as functional for Jeff as possible.

Here are some pictures from today's demolition:

We are so blessed to have such a wide range of talents and expertise in our family! Their willingness to serve is amazing and truthfully speaking we couldn't do it without everyone's help. Our extended family is an incredible group of people who have rallied together for our family during this trial and we are so grateful for each and every one of them!

Josh is included in this as we've unofficially adopted him into our family. He's done so much for us and has shown nothing but love and respect to each of us. He even showed up to the demolition party with two big bags of bagels with cream cheese!

Jeff had a rough morning as far as being tired goes. He said he slept "pretty good" with the CPAP machine, but that he had to remember to keep his mouth closed. He says when he opened it, like to talk, it made him feel as if he was being suffocated. We think it may be similar to when wind takes a baby's breath away, but much worse. He doesn't want to try the mask that goes over his nose and mouth because he is worried it will make his cotton mouth worse.

The respiratory therapist tonight, Shirley, went above and beyond her call of duty. She said the machine and mask he had used last night was an older model. The plastic pushed on his nose and left a red mark even after they tried to pad it.

Shirley took the initiative to find him a better machine and a mask that fits over his mustache without leaking. She also turned the humidity up to help keep him more moist. We are really hoping that tonight will be easier for him now that he knows what to expect and because of all of Shirley's help. Annette says she was awesome!

Jeff seemed a little down today, mostly about being so tired and not having the use of his hands. He has more than enough reason to have low days after all he's been through. He woke up tired again and struggled to stay awake for a lot of the morning. Things got better as the day progressed.

After his shower this morning Julee brought him and Annette smoothies from Jamba Juice. He liked his Peanut Butter Berry, but didn't like Annette's Aloha Pineapple. Then Julee helped him narrow his shower chair options down to two. With a little more research she hopes to find the exact features he needs and decide which one will be the best fit for him.

Some bad news for today, Jeff has his first UTI (urinary tract infection). It is an inevitable part of life when you have to rely on catheters to empty your bladder and we are grateful he made it this long without one. He wanted to avoid antibiotics and go straight for the cranberry juice, but the doctor wouldn't go for it. So he is on antibiotics and Annette will be bringing cranberry juice to help prevent future problems if possible.

Good news for today, Jeff's blood pressure is continuing to stabilize. Just two weeks ago he was taking 15mg of a blood pressure med (midodrine) 4 times a day to keep it elevated properly. Now he only takes 10mg twice a day! They tried to go without it this morning, but he's not quite ready yet and his blood pressure was lower than desired in the afternoon.

He didn't have therapy until after lunch because the weekends are more relaxed. He was given a manual (self propelled) wheelchair today and practiced pushing himself around the hallways. Because he doesn't have stomach muscles he had to be strapped in to keep from falling forward. He also helped by telling the therapist how to adjust it properly so he was at a better angle and more comfortable. As expected he went an impressive distance by the time they were done.

After therapy he had some much needed visitors.

Alysia and John Maynard visited with their family. They brought Jeff some Krispy Kreme doughnuts and watermelon to help get rid of the water in his legs. Thank you for being so thoughtful! We'd discussed watermelon before, but none of us ever actually got any!

Roxane also came again to visit and have dinner with Annette. Annette says she really enjoyed it and likes spending that time with Roxane when she comes.

Randy emailed Jeff his plans for the bathroom and they discussed them. It was determined that the design wouldn't work and Randy went back to the drawing board. His second set of plans switched the locations of the sink and toilet and allowed for better wheelchair accessibility. Jeff liked the plans and is now one step closer to a new bathroom!

Cherie took her turn staying with Jeff tonight and found it very difficult emotionally. She says she can only imagine how he feels right now and it's hard for her.

It was a quiet night and they couldn't find anything good to watch on TV to entertain him and keep him awake. So she tried to make conversation and he kept falling asleep anyway. This is very normal for him this time off day, but she felt bad and like she wasn't a good enough entertainer.

She told him that she needed him to get better so that he can be a grandpa to her daughter Aliyah who is almost four months old. Cherie wants him to be able to play with her children someday. He said that he would do his best to get his hands and legs back, but it will be as the Lord wills it. Cherie says it was difficult for her to hear him say that even though she knows he's right.

She helped him eat a doughnut and then helped him brush his teeth. She felt bad but also laughed when she spilled some water down his neck.

Cherie asked him, "Does it frustrate you that you can't do these things alone?"

Jeff responded, "It's a new way of life. It makes me more grateful for those who help me do it."

Cherie says she has a whole new perspective on things now. It's one thing to hear that others have to brush his teeth, feed him, etc. It's completely different to be the one helping him. It really made things real for her. It really made her sad.

No matter how great of an attitude Jeff has, what's happened to him is sad. We are grateful that he's been holding up so well up to this point. He always says that he has to have a good attitude or he wouldn't have anything. We have all been blessed by the strength of his testimony and are so grateful that it has withstood so much opposition as he faces each new day.

Day 33 - September 25, 2015

From Peggy, Jeff's Mother:
I started the day helping Jeff with his breakfast. He said, "Enough of the breakfast burritos!" I agree, not such a good start to the day.

He complained a little bit about his upper chest hurting when he took a big breath. Based on the workouts he has been doing, I thought it was sore pectoral muscles and lactic acid build up. He mentioned it to his doctor earlier and to be safe, Jeff went through an electrocardiogram, blood test, canceled X-ray, replaced with a CT scan. This took place all throughout the day, in between his occupational therapy, lunch, physical therapy, and other daily stuff.

After his occupational therapy, there was no more pain in his chest because he worked out the lactic acid, again my opinion. So by the end of the day the CT scan showed no problems with the lungs.

It takes a lot of specific timing on our part to get anything done, such as computer time and book keeping, which was our goal today. With me nudging Jeff, after his lunch and pain pill, we managed to do a good part of the book keeping he wanted me to do. I finished it up while he was in physical therapy.

Alex, Jeff's occupational therapist, had a former patient come in at the end of the session and visit with Jeff. His name is Rock and he's four months into his rehab after a 4 wheeler accident that broke his C8, which meant he has full use of his hands. Rock was informative along with encouragement, but also let Jeff know of some of the other things that need to be carefully watched with the changes his body is going through.

So it will be a mixed bag of ups and downs of Jeff's Journey for the next 10 months or so. They also discussed the pros and cons of Neuroworx and Tosh rehab center, which shed some more light on the next step Jeff will be taking.

I sensed a bit of discouragement today.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jeff's CT scan today was for the doctor to rule out a possible blood clot in his lung. They did a blood test to see how his clotting factors look and they were high. It's a high probability that Jeff will be on blood thinners for the rest of his life.

Great news is that it was negative! His lungs are thankfully clear. We are grateful they took things seriously and checked to make sure there wasn't a problem. Better safe than sorry.

Brandi, Zach, Ryan, Julee, their baby Tylee, Cherie, Blake, and their baby Aliyah surprised Jeff and Annette with a visit this evening. We all wanted to be together to pass along a special gift to them.  The gift was a check with the combined donations from the GoFundMe account so far and a collection of cards and money donations given to Brandi by her loving and thoughtful coworkers at Salt Lake Community College.

We cannot even begin to express our gratitude for this incredible gift! In one month we had 93 donations to the GoFundMe account, adding up to a total of $11,080! After the fees were taken out of the total balance we still have enough to pay off Jeff's deductible for this year. A burden has been lifted because of the combined generosity of everyone who donated and it's impossible for us to say thank you enough times!

We have truly been provided for during this difficult time in more ways than one. The Lord gives us what we need to overcome the trials we face in this life. Many times it's the help of others that lead to answered prayers, another example of how you've been the Lord's hands in our lives.

Everyone left for the evening except Ryan and Julee. The others went to eat at Noodles and Co. and Brandi graciously took baby Tylee so she wouldn't be fussy at the hospital because she was tired. Instead she fussed at Brandi's house the whole time! Tylee is a definite momma's girl and a home body.

Ryan and Julee are grateful for the time they were able to dedicate to Jeff tonight. Julee helped him finish eating his dinner. The meal he had ordered got lost somehow so before leaving Blake took a meal voucher to the cafeteria and got him a hamburger with sweet potato fries. Jeff ate just over half of it all.

Jeff worries about calorie intake because he wants to make sure his body is burning what he eats. His body will be easier to move around and maneuver if he can keep his thin frame. We discussed elevating his legs, which are still quite swollen, to see if we can get rid of some of the edema (water weight) while he sleeps.

Ryan and Jeff then worked to download software onto Jeff's computer to further customize his mouse so it will work even better for his needs.

Next on the list was to research shower chairs and wheelchairs. Jeff wanted to stay awake so badly, but kept dozing off. Ryan encouraged him to take a 15 minute nap while he and Julee continued to look at different options. Several were saved for Jeff's occupational therapist to look at.

Here are a few pictures of the assistive devices Jeff uses:

This first one is of the silverware Jeff uses to eat and the tools he uses that straighten out his pointer fingers so he can type and push buttons.

This second picture is of the water bottle that was jimmy rigged by Jeff's occupational therapist so he can get a drink by himself at night and not worry about spills. Julee found the water bottle and the therapists made the plastic piece you see on it.  The rubber bands weren't that snug so Brandi tried to tighten them and broke one, but luckily Jacee (Jeff's niece) had a hair band and it saved the day as it worked a lot better than the rubber band and made the device fit more snug.

They then watched YouTube videos of other paraplegics getting in and out of their vehicles and discussed the different methods and modifications that were used. Jeff's mind is always running and he already has an idea of what he wants for when he is able to start driving again.

It was time to get ready for bed so Julee helped him brush his teeth and the nurse came in to give him his meds. As they worked on his nightly routine Julee read the blog to him. He doesn't know what's written until he reads it most of the time. He especially loves the comments and feedback left by others so please feel free to share your thoughts! If you would rather share your thoughts and comments privately Jeff would love to hear from you and you can email him directly at Jeff.Page.Rides@gmail.com.

Unfortunately Jeff did not get to use the CPAP machine last night because they didn't have it yet. Good news is that it was being set up by the respiratory therapist when Ryan and Julee finally left for the night. We are all anxious to find out if it helps him sleep better or not! The one that was ordered for him only covers his nose so hopefully he won't struggle to get a drink while wearing it. The CPAP machine has a humidification system and we also hope it will help with his plugged nose each night.

Jeff remains mostly optimistic and looks to the future with realistic expectations. It really helps him to see the videos of other paraplegics who also can't use their hands or stomach muscles. They show him the many possibilities that are still open for him and help him form realistic goals for himself at this point in his recovery.

We want to thank everyone again for all of your help on the financial side of things. We've received money donations on the front porch of Jeff's home, in the mail, in person, and online. Every dime is a blessing that will help us cover the extensive medical expenses that continue to accrue each day. Every dollar we receive is one dollar less that we have to worry about coming up with. It all counts!

Day 32 - September 24, 2015

Today marks one month since the accident. What a month it has been! The progress Jeff has made since that day is incredible. He was dependent on people for absolutely everything. He couldn't even scratch his nose on his own. Now he's far ahead of others who have experienced similar injuries. His faith in the Lord's plan for him has been his saving grace. 

In keeping with his go-go personality he hasn't stopped working to improve since that day. He hasn't allowed bitterness, frustration, or anger to keep him from progressing. He hasn't allowed himself to dwell on what he's lost and forget what he still has. 

While we can't pretend we aren't disappointed with certain things so far, it's nothing Jeff has the ability to change. However much movement and sensation he will regain is in the Lord's hands and we have to remain faithful and count our blessings, just like Jeff does. His example inspires us as he serves our Father in heaven and shares his message of patience and long suffering each and every day. 

Annette shared her thoughts about all of you who have given so much to help our family during this difficult time. With tears of gratitude she said, "People are so wonderful! It really means a lot that they show they care and even just to know they are there for us. The cards we've gotten are full of inspiring thoughts and we love to read them. I received a gift card to Rumbi and some money in the mail... people are just so thoughtful. I just want to thank everyone!"

The amount of support our family has been given is overwhelming! Even the little things you do to let us know you are thinking about us, taking the time to visit, asking how things are going... those promptings are from the Spirit. When you do these little, yet significant things you are helping to answer our prayers. You are giving us much needed encouragement. You are reminding us that we aren't alone in this. The Lord knows what we need and sends those promptings to you to provide for those needs. 

Thank you all for everything you have done for us! Your efforts to uplift us have not gone unnoticed. We feel it every day. We thank the Lord for you every day. 

Today started off a bit rougher than others. When Annette arrived just before breakfast Jeff was still asleep. For a long time he was very out of it and would not wake up. Trying to find a way to simulate him, Annette went to find his breakfast because no one had delivered it. 

When she brought it back to the room she tried again to wake him up and he didn't respond to her efforts. It was scary for her because while he gets very drowsy at times he usually wakes up enough to respond before falling back asleep. She talked to him as she cut up his meal, reminding him that he had to complete all his morning cares before therapy. 

Finally he woke up enough to acknowledge her and she helped him eat a little breakfast. He was then able to stay awake for his morning routine. After that things seemed to go much smoother. 

During physical therapy he worked on his balance by playing a game with Annette. He would sit on the special therapy bench (with hydraulics so it goes up and down) and balance by himself while holding a weighted ball. Without using his hands to balance he would then throw Annette the ball. He was able to do it nine times before touching down on the bench! 

He told the therapist that he really enjoyed it because it was challenging and fun at the same time. 

For some reason his left side is much stronger than his right. He is able to roll and swing his body to the left, but unable to do it toward the right. He continues to practice transfers and does strengthening exercises every day and is doing really well. He is well on his way to an independent way of life despite his disabilities. 

After the hour and a half therapy session it was lunchtime. Jeff ate soup on his own for the first time, clam chowder. He really liked it and Annette said he did great with the spoon.

Janeane Shaw came and took Annette to lunch while Jeff rested. We are so grateful to her and all of Annette's friends who have spent time with her and remind her that you care! 

Other visitors today were Rosalie Ewell and Carolyn and Jack Johnson from Jeff's church ward. Thank you for taking the time to drop by, it means a lot to all of us! 

A follow up x ray of Jeff's neck was completed today to see how things are healing. We are hoping for good news so he can get rid of his brace in two weeks as discussed. 

Occupational therapy focused on different methods other paraplegics use to empty their own bladders. They hope to make a plan so Jeff will regain his independence in this area of his life also. 

Roxane came to spend the evening with Jeff. She and Annette brought salads from the cafeteria up to Jeff's room for dinner.

Jeff is supposed to start with his new CPAP machine tonight! They conducted a more thorough sleep study on him and the results are astounding. Jeff stops breathing approximately 75 times per hour! The average person only stops breathing about 5 times per hour. While he probably had a small amount of sleep apnea before the accident, they think the injury and the fact that he now has to sleep on his back are both contributing to making it worse. 

A CPAP machine in the most basic sense is a fan forcing air into the airway via nose, mouth, or both depending on the mask being used. It is a constant reminder to the subconscious to keep breathing. While that's not the scientific explanation it's the basic idea for anyone wanting to know. Babies who struggle to breathe at birth are placed on CPAP to force their lungs open and simulate the breathing reflex. 

We suspect that the sleep he does get is not very restful because of how severe his sleep apnea is. We are hopeful that the CPAP machine will greatly improve his quality of sleep and perhaps even decrease his morning drowsiness. 

Roxanne reports that she had a good time with Jeff last night. They watched a couple of the old Magnum PI tv shows and she said, "It's fun to watch it with him because he still tells the actors what to do and comments at the poor fight scenes and how fake they look." Same old Jeff!

She also reported that Jake came to visit just before bedtime and they talked guns and cars, their two favorite things. 

Of our dad she said, "I am amazed and proud of the way Jeff is dealing with this time of his life and how hard he works to overcome the challenges he has. He has inspired people he doesn't even know to better themselves and to work at changing their life for the better."

We have received a lot of great feedback about this blog and we want to say thank you! A lot of thought, prayer, and time goes into each post. 

As we share our dad's story we hope that others may be inspired by his endless faith as we have been! Our mom and dad are incredible people who have taught us a lot about life, love, and faith through their amazing example during this trial. We love them so much and want to acknowledge their hard work, strength,  and dedication to each other, our family, and our Heavenly father. 

Day 31 - September 23, 2015

Not a lot of changes today. The routine is pretty much the same each day. When he's lucky Jeff will get all his morning chores done before breakfast and then have his naptime after. More often he has breakfast and halfway sleeps through his morning chores.

The morning "crash session" is just one of many frustrating problems that he faces each day. And yet he doesn't let it get him down. He continues to find his blessings by recognizing what he still can do and chooses to focus on that instead.

The social worker was in today to see Jeff. They told him that everyone loves working with him and how great he is. She said, "You're the rock star of this floor!" He has really made an impact during his stay. His amazing attitude, quirky personality, hard work, endurance, and most especially his faith have helped to give him quite the reputation!

While Jeff is seen as a favorite among the staff, he's also acting as an inspiration for other patients. He cheers them on and encourages them. He gets to know them and their stories. He has spoken with patients who had attempted suicide with devastating consequences. He's met many others who were in accidents like his, that also had their lives change in a split second.

Whether they are there for injuries related to a car accident, a gunshot wound to the head, or a dive into the shallow end of a swimming pool, Jeff has been a light to them all. He lifts them up with words of encouragement, hope, and faith. He is the ultimate example of perseverance. He is a true disciple of Jesus Christ.

Annette reflected on the past month tonight. While she felt she had difficulty finding the exact words to describe her feelings, her message was clear. "We have been so blessed that time has not stood still. The Lord has blessed us with no wasted time, getting things accomplished, and progress."

The "limbo" after an accident like this can last for so long sometimes. Where progress means you don't die that day and therapy is a thing in a far away future. That has not been Jeff's experience. Even when he was in the ICU he was making progress and accomplishing difficult feats each day. In the condition he found himself in even keeping a meal down and fighting off despair were seen as triumphs.

Annette says she has never thought, "Oh my gosh, I can't believe I have to sit here for another day!" They have been so busy making strides towards Jeff's recovery that she says she can't believe how quickly the past month has gone by. For that we are all grateful. We have truly been blessed in this trial.

As always physical therapy was rigorous, just how Jeff likes it. Every day he impresses them with how well he's doing and how quickly he masters new skills. He worked on transfers from his wheelchair to the therapy table and back again. Annette says he has been very persistent to learn how to do the transfers by himself and is doing extremely well. Jeff says he was able to complete 80% of the transfer by himself which is really great!  This will go a long way in helping him become more independent.

Throughout the day Jeff was able to get more book work done. The joys of owning your own business! In the afternoon Brandi helped him with bookwork, occupational therapy and more bookwork while Annette went to a much needed appointment to pamper herself, compliments of a long time family friend Melissa Henderson. We are so grateful for her kindness and the thoughtful gift, our mom needed and deserved it!

Jeff wants nothing more than to get the use of his hands back, but he's also very aware that it may not be the Lord's will. He is choosing to put his energy into finding ways to accomplish every day tasks with how his hands are right now. His occupational therapist helped him find a gadget that will allow him to reach for things and pick them up. The device reminds Annette of an erector set and is called a Quad Tool. You can see a video of how it works at www.quadtools.com.

Here is a picture of Jeff on the computer ordering one of the devices.  Josh the OT had Jeff complete the order from start to finish without any help and he did GREAT!!

During occupational therapy (OT) Jeff was asked to open a pill bottle, pick up small pieces and put them in a bowl, clip clothes pins on the side of the bowl, stack blocks and pick up beads. All of these things seem easy to us, but for him they are extremely difficult.  Jeff still has no use of his fingers so doing these things is a challenge.  All of the movement that is required to help him do these things comes from his wrists and he is learning how to use the movement in his wrist to get his "floppy fingers" to be in the right position.  During OT Jeff made the comment that "being disabled is difficult!!"  The occupational therapist agreed with him 100%.  Brandi reported that while watching Jeff during OT it was hard to see her dad struggle and though she expected him to get frustrated he just kept on trying, he would not give up!  He continued to push through the challenge until he was able to do what the OT asked of him. Through the entire 1 1/2 hour session he only said "SHIT" once and for a few seconds there was some frustration, but then it turned in to determination as Jeff continued trying until he succeeded.

Jeff was able to feed himself lunch and dinner again today. He's now a pro at using the odd silverware.

Terren (Jeff's brother), his wife Stephanie, and their daughters Isabel and Jacee stayed for the evening to keep Jeff company. Terren and Jeff spent a lot of time discussing Jeff's motorcycle and what they can do to help him be able to ride it. They also looked up trucks and discussed ideas on how to remodel the house and bathroom.

Stephanie said, "We just made sure he was comfortable. We gave him water and helped him brush his teeth. Then the nurses came in and helped him get ready for bed. I'm really impressed with his attitude and how well he looks."

The respiratory therapist came in and discussed him wearing the humidification mask again. While it helps a little it doesn't get rid of the cotton mouth. He said he would try it again tonight anyway since the sleep apnea machine (CPAP) to help him sleep better is not there yet.

Funny moment of the day: Stephanie asked Jeff if he wanted a treat and he said no because he is getting fat. She thought that was pretty funny and replied that it was the water weight!

On a more serious note she said, "Terren really needed to make that leap and go see his brother. This has been extremely difficult for him."

We know how hard it is to accept what has happened. Some are struggling more than others and that's OKAY. This trial, while obviously affecting Jeff the worst, has been a trial for all of his loved ones too. Each of us have experienced grief and have had to find ways to cope.

What most of us have concluded is that Jeff's incredible attitude and faith have carried us all through the initial shock and throughout the phases of recovery. The person who is hurting the most has proven to be the strongest of us all. Just seeing him thrive and progress uplifts those of us who are hurting for him at this time.

I know none of us will ever be able to say we are glad this happened, but each and every one of us can say we've been blessed because of it. The Lord's plan is extremely difficult sometimes, but it always leads to innumerable blessings if we can be patient and faithful.

Day 30 - September 22, 2015

Jeff had a pretty good day today with a little extra fun thanks to his awesome occupational therapist. We'll get to that later.

His day started off really well with his awesome nurse, Johnathan, who got him up and showered, with other morning necessities completed, and back to bed before breakfast! Jeff said Johnathan even took the time to wash his hair twice to help his itchy, dry scalp. He did shower twice a day before this, after all!

It tired him out, as usual, so after he and Annette finished breakfast he took a nap until therapy. He really likes this routine best and we are so grateful for Johnathan's help to get it accomplished today. We know that's a busy time of morning so it means even more to us that he put our dad as a higher priority.

An unfortunate realization was made today. Better now than when he's home and not being monitored as closely. After his shower Jeff went without a shirt. His body is unable to regulate his temperatures, something he's already struggled with. Until now we've seen how he can get overheated easily and get a fever. Now we learned the opposite is just as problematic.

Annette said his skin was ice cold to the touch. Going without a shirt after a shower isn't a good idea. His core temperature dropped a whole two degrees! He can't feel if he's too warm or too cold until it's too late. At least now we know to be more conscious of it.

He sat in the sun with warm blankets while lifting weights just before PT in order to elevate his temperature to a more healthy range. Thankfully it was an easy fix without lasting consequences. Lesson learned. Needless to say, Annette went and bought him a zip up fleece sweatshirt when she left this evening to prevent it from happening again.

They used to split his physical therapy between an hour in the AM and a half hour in the PM. Jeff felt that it wasted time getting everything set up twice and asked if they could combine the two sessions in the morning. They were great about it and he's really liked doing the hour and a half in the mornings.

He excels at everything they ask him to do. With practice and patience he improves each and every day on the tasks that are given to him. While we all want to see him make a full recovery, and are hoping and praying for it, the goals they set in PT are based on what he can currently do.

This means finding tools and learning skills for his current disabilities. He only has the top half of his arms, can't use his hands, and has nothing below his nipple line. When he eventually gets to Neuroworx they will be focusing more on what he can have in the future instead, so the goals will be much different.

Jeff fed himself lunch again today! Annette cut everything up into bite sized pieces and says he did a really good job and he's getting really good at using his special silverware.

The company that made Jeff's wheelchair came in to fix some issues with it. They adjusted the headrest so it was at a better angle and then replaced the generic plug with one meant for that specific model. They also discussed a pressure release seat that's available for his chair. They figure out where his pressure points are and can custom make the seat to fit him specifically and reduce the pressure to those areas.

Occupational therapy was in the afternoon with Josh, one of our favorites! He sure didn't disappoint today. He actually spent quite a bit more time than what he had allotted helping our dad. They looked online at different gadgets and things, like grabbers that would allow Jeff to pick things up from off the ground for example.

They also watched videos of how other wheelchair bound people have solved common problems they deal with and what tips and tricks they've learned along the way, like how to close a door when the hallway is too narrow to negotiate very easily.

A goal Jeff and Josh set was that Jeff would be able to work his TV remote. To accomplish this Josh found him a little gadget that attaches to his straightened pointer finger and allows him to poke things like buttons on a remote or even computer keys. It has proven to be much more effective than the other method Jeff was using to type and he is very excited! It's also much smaller and easier to use.

With Annette and Blake's help Jeff was able to get important book work done today in between everything else. Cherie also helped by printing off bills so they can be sent out.

An old friend, Kevin Leak, came to visit and even helped Annette transfer Jeff from his wheelchair back to bed. It's much easier to do with two people and it feels good to be involved, even in such a small way. We are grateful he took the time to visit and gave such loving service while he was there.

It's incredible to see so many people willing and wanting to participate in Jeff's healing process. Family members and visitors taking an interest in what he's learning and even helping during therapy... we are so grateful to all of you. Your actions give invaluable encouragement and support.

Most of his pain is located in his shoulders and the back of his neck. Those are the muscles he is now using to compensate for the rest of his body not working. That load is an incredible strain as he learns to move his body and balance. It also puts strain on his incision which, in the nicest of terms, is extremely uncomfortable. He is also counting down the days until he can get the neck brace off and hopes that it will help him be more comfortable.

Annette prepared Jeff's dinner and he was able to feed himself again. After that Annette left and Blake (Cherie's husband) stayed until bedtime. They watched Avatar, one of Jeff's favorite Sci-fi movies. Blake says the only interruption came when it was pill time and they didn't even have to press pause.

The end of another successful day. Every day that hope overcomes despair is a success, but Jeff does far more than just search for hope. He works for it. In every therapy session, every conversation, and every prayer he works to improve his circumstances and in turn gains hope.

His life is drastically changed, but it's not over. The most important thing is that he understands the difference and accepts it, which he has! Thank you to everyone who continues to remind him of his purpose on this earth and the potential he still has to live a full life.

Day 29 - September 21, 2015

Today was much like every other day. Annette got to the hospital in time to help Jeff with breakfast. She actually brings him cereal from home because that's what he likes best. So they share the hot breakfast he orders, then he eats cereal while she eats some yogurt. A happy arrangement for them both!

They report that Jeff did really well in therapy, as always. He has never been one to do things halfway. His pain was better in the morning, but he struggled with it for the afternoon. He did a total of an hour and a half of physical therapy this morning. Yahoo! But it's really no wonder he hurt later on.

Jeff fed himself his entire lunch today! Annette said they chose the easiest meal on the menu: mac and cheese. He used special utensils provided by the occupational therapist and did really well with them. Annette said she's going to have to let him do it more often so he can get used to it.

 

It's been most difficult for Annette, and even for the rest of us, to watch him struggle to do the simple things. It's almost instinctive for us to want to do them for him. It takes quite a bit of self restraint just to allow him to do what he can on his own. We all know it's best for him to practice, but that doesn't make it any easier.

In between everything else that went on today Jeff says he found some time to read, respond to, and delete emails. It's amazing how something so simple can be comforting. It was a part of his everyday routine before the accident and to have even a sliver of that familiarity back is a blessing.

Jeff said, "I actually got a nap this afternoon! It's the first time in a long time that that's happened." He got really drowsy from the pain meds he took after therapy and was thankfully able to sleep for a while without too much interference.

He had several visitors this evening, for which we are so grateful!

An old high school friend, Todd Jex, dropped by unexpectedly. Jeff and Annette were very happy to see him. Annette reported that he struggled a bit during the visit. We understand his feelings all too well and appreciate him taking the time to visit despite whatever reservations he may have had. He told them, "I just had to come see you for myself."

It's incredible the amount of compassion we've seen from people during this struggle. Even people who aren't closely connected with Jeff have been affected. They feel the same pain and confusion we feel over this tragedy. It's brought so many people together and widened our support network tenfold! This is the Lord's work in our lives.

Shane and Janeane Shaw also dropped in. They brought Annette some dinner and Jeff some movies. Jeff has always been a "movie buff" so to speak. Since the accident his list of movies to see has been slowly growing. The two they brought him were on that list and he's looking forward to watching them, preferably without a thousand interruptions this time!

Jeff has officially been diagnosed with sleep apnea. This is a common problem where people stop breathing for short periods of time when asleep. To his family this really is no surprise. In the ICU they noticed it caused a drop in oxygen saturations while he slept, but that wasn't their main concern at the time.

They have discussed a CPAP machine, but he's been told the hospital doesn't have the proper equipment to test for pressure settings and so forth in order to personalize it to what he needs. We are awaiting further discussion before decisions are made.

While Jeff says he's been sleeping better the past several days, he also says that his nose gets stuffy at night and then magically gets better when he gets up in the morning. He also thinks the humidity mask is improving his cotton mouth by at least 50 percent even though it's still a pain to use. Silver linings...

Zach (Brandi's husband) volunteered to stay with Jeff until bedtime so Annette could go home and get a few things done this evening. Some things can only be put off for so long, like grocery shopping and a full night's sleep.

When Annette left, Dr. Jacques was there for a visit. Dr. Jacques has been the Page family Chiropractor for many years and owns Back On Track Chiropractic in South Jordan, UT. In the past Jeff would usually bypass other medical help and go to Dr. Jacques first after having a biking accident. Dr. Jacques expertise and opinion are much valued by all of us. It's unfortunate this wreak was so different than the others.

 

Zach enjoyed watching Dr. Jacques interact with Jeff and insisted that we tell everyone about the funny part of the visit.  For anyone who knows Dr. Jacques, you know that he knows exactly where to "poke" in order to make you scream and it wasn't any different this time.  Dr. Jacques was asking Jeff questions and saying can you feel this, can you feel that, and then he started to talk to Jeff about the muscles in his hands and as he "poked" Jeff in the hand he let out a "scream".  At least we know Jeff has feeling in certain parts of his hands!  We are grateful for Dr. Jacques and his concern for Jeff and our family.

Jeff's inspiring words tonight were, "There is room for improvement every day, but today was a good day." While we may see this as the understatement of a lifetime, we are grateful that he is focusing on the small successes he has each day. These smaller achievements are what turn into larger ones in the future.

It's this broader perspective of the situation he finds himself in that really sets him apart from other people. He sees the larger picture and recognizes the importance of the baby steps required to reach the end goal. This is what fascinates people who talk to him about his condition. This is why he is so far ahead of others mentally, emotionally, and spiritually who find themselves in similar situations.

This is why we are being inspired every day by our dad. We are truly blessed by his example.

Day 28 - September 20, 2015

Jeff reports another good day. No surprise there with how well he has held up so far. He never ceases to amaze us!

Last night they put a bulky humidity mask over his face while he slept to try and reduce the cotton mouth he is experiencing. It's a nasty side effect of his medications. He says the mask is noisy and obnoxious and makes it very difficult for him to get a drink. He has a special cup the therapist rigged for him so he can get a drink by himself without worrying about spills.

Impressively he lasted until about 4 am before finally taking the mask off for good. He was done trying to get it out of the way to take a drink. After he removed it was when he really noticed the benefits it had given him. He soon experienced a shrinking sensation in his mouth as things dried out even more.

It seems more and more frequently he is having to fight two evils. Horrible, annoying mask or horrible, annoying dry mouth. Not enough pain meds and too much pain, too many pain meds and way too drowsy.

Of course he doesn't let it get him down. He continues to look for the good in each situation and has a way of finding it.

He reported that the mask seemed to improve his dry mouth by at least 30 percent, which may make it worth trying again. While his pain is not very well controlled during the bulk of the day, it seems to get better in the evenings and with fewer pain meds he is more alert.

I don't think any of us knew just how much of an eternal optimist he is until now! But then again, he never had cause to search out silver linings like he does now. We are definitely grateful he has a knack for it.

His breakfast was late arriving to his room, but he says it was fine. He is also still enjoying the food they serve him.

He got his hair washed today and how he described it made us laugh. "Annette scratched my whole head with her fingernails and shampoo and it was awesome!" It's always been a favorite thing of his for Annette to scratch his scalp with her fingernails.

Jeff's sister Elise and her daughter Olivia came to visit with Jay. Elise helped him during his morning therapy. He worked on his balance by sitting up and hitting a balloon back and forth with her.

Later Jeff's Aunt Nola (Jay's sister) and her husband Chuck came to visit. Jeff and Annette really enjoyed the time they got to spend with them.

Rick Anderson, a childhood friend of Jeff's, also came today. He brought a friend of his that is also paralyzed. While their situations are different because the friend has the use of his hands and stomach muscles, Jeff said it was great hearing his story and seeing his success. He can even stand and waddle, though Jeff pointed out his wheelchair is much more efficient.

Things were very busy this morning and everyone (Jeff, Annette, and the staff) forgot about emptying Jeff's bladder. When they finally remembered they got 1300mL's out! That's over a liter! To put it into perspective most people feel the urge to pee between 200 and 500mL's. It might be considered a small mercy that he wasn't able to feel that because it probably would have been awfully painful.

Then this evening when he reminded the nurse to empty his bladder because it was getting close to being time he was told he would have to wait because they were busy from being short staffed.

His biggest frustration with this is that he feels the nurses need an advocate. Someone with time and money to really make a difference. If the staff is happy and able to do their job properly then the patients are all happy. It seems simple enough, but his experience so far has included way too many overworked staff members who have way too many places to be all at once.

He said, "Shame on the overpaid CEO's for allowing this to happen." They cut costs to line their pockets and in the end it's the staff working for them and ultimately the patients who suffer.

On a lighter note, Jeff loves the demo bed he is using and enjoys teaching all the nurses and staff members how to use it. He thinks within the month he'll have everyone trained properly on its use!

And lastly for today Jeff and Annette tried to watch a movie together, one from the Divergent series. They quickly learned that it was an impossible task with how many interruptions they get. It may be a while before they try that again!

As always we end the day full of gratitude and with a spirit of humility that can only come through difficult times. There is no doubt of the Lord's love for our dad and our family. We know that He hears our prayers, knows our needs and desires, and blesses us according to our faith.

Thank you for being His hands during this difficult time. There is no doubt that our prayers are being answered every day through the service you all provide us. From well wishes to a bowl of soup, it all means so much to all of us. Thank you!

Day 27 - September 19, 2015

A lot was accomplished today at the hospital and at Jeff's home.

Jeff says that while he didn't crash this morning he still struggled with being very drowsy. Both he and Annette report that therapy is going really well regardless. He is able to roll himself over and is now sitting at the side of the bed for extended periods of time without help.

"It's amazing how much energy it takes to balance," said a very tired Jeff.

He has been struggling with a large amount of pain to the back of his head and neck. While he's taking pain medication it's been difficult to get the dosage and frequency correct. Too much and he's way too groggy. Too little and he's hurting so badly he can hardly function.

Between welcome visitors, therapy, and many other interruptions Jeff says he was able to get some much needed book work completed with the help of his brother Randy. While they worked on book work, Randy's wife, Tiffany, went with Annette to her house to help prepare it for the upcoming remodel.

A huge shout out to Alexa (Randy and Tiffany's daughter) for playing with Kaisy and Sierra today so that Brandi could help out at Jeff's house as well.

 

Between Annette, Tiffany, Brandi and Blake (Cherie's husband) the house & garage is pretty much ready for remodeling to begin. The four of them worked really hard and the Lord blessed them because they were able to accomplish so much in a short period of time.  While Cherie desperately wanted to help out as well, she was unable to because she was taking care of Aliyah (3 months old), who has a cold and an ear infection.

A few things they will be starting on next week include widening specific doorways and redoing the front bathroom. Doors have already been ordered and we are well on our way to making things happen!

While we all wish this had never happened we cannot deny the many blessings that have come to pass because of it. The way our loved ones (family and friends alike) have rallied together for our dad is incredible.

On our own we would be lost. Because of all of your help, and the Lord's guiding hand, we are making strides each and every day towards healing and success.

The progress our dad is making brings us so much peace and comfort. We have been so blessed by his testimony and faith. Even when he's hurting and exhausted he still manages to say, "It was a good day."

Day 26 - September 18, 2015 - From Peggy

This morning began very early for me, Jeff's mom, to fill in for Annette as she returned to her work at the HandMaiden for one day a week. The first bonus for arriving at 7:45 a.m. is the ease of finding a parking spot. Of course Jeff was awake, cooling off from the night's sleep and waiting for me to assist in eating his breakfast and get the day rolling.

Today went very smooth and on time, perhaps because he had his day nurse and 2 techs/CNA's to keep the day on track. Physical and occupational therapy alternated throughout the day until 3:00 p.m., lunch of course was in between. Jeff did exceptionally well with what was expected of him and beyond. His sister Roxane joined us for the day and we both enjoyed being a part of his therapy, helping and learning at the same time. Jeff's dad, Jay, came in time for lunch. He and Roxane had lunch in the cafeteria and brought my lunch up to Jeff's room. Jeff took his first little nap of the day, which was something different. One of his medications was stopped, and it proved to be the one that was making him drowsy.

The surprise of the day came when the rotation changed to occupational therapy. His therapist took him for an outing at the Best Buy located across the street. I could watch from his 12th floor window as Jeff motored in his power chair with Josh walking beside him. Jeff did all the button pushing from elevators to cross walks and checked out a few things in the store. Josh had him negotiate over a very bumpy part of cement with holes on one street crossing, giving him a challenge, which he met. He enjoyed the hour long outing. It was a very nice day to be outside.

I set up Jeff's computer to take care of business preparing invoices. He did quite well with a pair of unique styluses. The hardest part was trying to fit in the time between the day's routine to get it done.

Brad and Heidi Frost came in at 4:00 p.m. and visited with him for more than an hour. Roxane headed home about then. Annette arrived in time to see the Frosts and then assist Jeff with his dinner. We tried to get some more business taken care of, but so many routine interruptions gave us a challenge. Jeff's daughter Brandi and her girls, Kaisalyn and Sierra, arrived with some dinner for them and Annette. Jeff and I continued to work on the invoices.

Jeff is enjoying the new bed and instructing everyone on how to use the controls. I believe it came from Germany and Jeff is putting it on trial. He has to give a rating on it throughout the day. He has it down after 3 days, but he has to explain over and over again to all the staff. Jeff's brother Randy and his wife Tiffany came in to visit and that is when I put the computer to hibernate and headed for home. I enjoyed the day being with Jeff and trying to help him in small ways. It felt good to be with my son, sharing in his improvements and experiences, a successful day in many ways.

Day 25 - September 17, 2015

Today was a very busy and long day for all of us.  I (Brandi Ann Benson) had the opportunity to visit with my dad again all day today and you guys are in for a novel as I don't know how to write briefly about my visits - hope you like reading!

I arrived just before 9:00AM and my dad was in good spirits and my mom was feeding him his breakfast.  My dad didn't eat very much for breakfast because he was trying to figure out if the food was what was making him crash every morning after breakfast and not be able to stay awake.  After 20 minutes of eating he was still feeling fine.  The nurse came it to give my dad his medicine and my dad asked what each medication was, what it was for and what the side effects were.  The nurse, Susan, was very understanding and patient and looked up each medication individually and read my dad the information.  One of the medications that he was supposed to take was to control nerve pain and the side effects of  that medication were drowsiness, dizziness, swollen legs, dry mouth, etc. We could pretty much say that my dad was experiencing almost all of the side effects listed, however he still had to take the medication until he spoke to the doctor about it.  So, he took the medication and within 15 minutes he was exhausted and falling asleep.  The doctor came in later that day and said that he would take my dad off of that particular medication and see how he did.  Let's hope that is the problem and it's that easy of a fix!

Josh who is one of my dad's occupational therapists came in around 10:00AM to work with my dad.  My dad asked him to take a look at the toilet/shower wheelchair to see if he could raise up the chair because it didn't fit over the top of the toilet like it was supposed to.  Josh looked at it and said he thought he might be able to fix it, but asked my dad if that was the best use of his time.  The occupation and physical therapists are strictly scheduled and if they are only supposed to be with you for 30 minutes, no matter what it is they are doing it counts towards that time.  My dad had Josh bring the wheelchair out of the bathroom and said "let me look at that, turn it over, seriously I am a mechanic I can tell you if it can be raised or not".  So Josh and I turned the wheelchair over so my dad could have a look.  Although we had already determined it could be raised my dad confirmed that and asked Josh to fix it.

While Josh was fixing the wheelchair I helped my dad get his computer setup.  He turned it on all by himself, was able to use his track ball mouse and a special assistive device they gave him to type (one letter at a time) that straps on to his left hand.  He has to type in all caps though because it takes too much effort to try and hold down the shift key and type a letter at the same time.  My dad used the outside of his right hand to move the trackball mouse around and then uses the bottom of his thumb on the outside of his right hand to click the buttons on the mouse. The first thing my dad did when he got on his computer was open up Strava and make sure that he gave kudos to all of his friends who had been riding their bikes recently.

While my dad and I were working on his computer, the lady who is a rep for the company that makes the bed my dad is testing out, came in and told him that they did find a bedside table that would work with his new bed and that they would have it to him by Friday or Saturday at the latest.  This was great news because right now my dad is using a upside down lunch tray on his lap and the bedside table will make things a lot better.

Josh came back with the wheelchair all fixed and it fit over the toilet just fine.  It was time for him to go so he couldn't stay longer, but I told him it was okay because while he was fixing the chair my dad and I were doing occupational therapy and explained to him how he had been using his computer.  Josh smiled and told me that I should charge my dad for my services and we all laughed.

Next came in the physical therapist and although I don't remember her name, I know that she likes to ride mountain bikes.  We helped my dad get into his motorized wheelchair and headed down to the physical therapy workout room.  My dad wasn't too happy that I wanted to take pictures, but I told him I had to because everyone has heard about him in his chair but hasn't seen him in it.  I didn't get very many smiles, but he let me take the pictures.

 

The green piece of material you are seeing behind my dad is what is hooked on to the hoist to lift him in and out of bed and his wheelchair.  Normally it is removed because it can cause sores if left bunched up, but when going from his room down to therapy (3 rooms away) they leave it in place so they can easily lift him out of his chair and on to the therapy mat.

My dad requested 1 hour and 30 minutes of therapy today because he wanted to get all the therapy in that he could since he wouldn't be getting his afternoon therapy.  He requested that the therapist not work him too hard because he wanted to feel okay for the field trip he was going on that afternoon.  The therapist decided to work on having him sit up on his own and balance (9 seconds on the side of the therapy table is his record so far).  She also worked with him a lot on turning over from his back to his side.  Both of these tasks seem so very simple, but for my dad it isn't.  He only has the use of some of his muscles in his arms, chest and neck so essentially he has to move the rest of his body using only the few muscles he has.  I would have taken pictures, but the therapists asked that I not take pictures because they don't want their faces all over the internet and I will respect their requests.  I can take pictures if they aren't in them or if you can't tell who it is (like the back of them), but that is really hard to do because they have to work so closely by my dad.  After a while my dad started to wear out and couldn't perform the way he wanted and his neck and upper back started aching really bad so they decided to have him lay down and the therapist stretched his wrists and shoulder blade muscles.  Therapy went pretty well today and my dad only fell asleep a few times.  The longer session allowed him to take his time and rest in-between activities.  We all felt the longer session was more beneficial and that we should request them instead of smaller split up sessions.

A funny story for the day:  While during therapy, the physical therapist kept looking right at me and speaking to me about my dad and asking me about his sleeping habits.  I thought it was a little weird but thought that she was just trying to include me.  Later, the therapist awkwardly found out that, I am not my dad's wife and that my mom is not my dad's mom and that my dad is older than 40 and that we aren't polygamists.  She was confused with how young we all looked and didn't want to assume we were polygamists so instead she assumed that I was my dad's wife and my mom was his mom.  We all had a good laugh and then I said, "from now on, instead of waiting for the nurse, tech or doctors to ask who we are, we should introduce ourselves".  This will hopefully save them the time of wondering and making up awkward stories about us.

After therapy my mom and I used the hoist to life my dad back into his bed without any help from the nurses or techs.  We are getting pretty good at it!  Lunch was also waiting when we got back, a cheeseburger.

After lunch the occupational therapist, Ron, came to pick my dad up for his afternoon field trip.  My dad was able to go home for a few hours so that Ron could assess my parents house to see what needed to be done to make it safe and comfortable for my dad when he comes home from the hospital.  My mom and I were very worried about my dad because you could tell he was tired and in pain and he wasn't as talkative as he usually is.  But he toughed it out and Ron was able to get him loaded into the hospital van for the ride to his house.

My Grandpa Jay (Jeff's dad), and my dad's brothers (Randy & Terren) met us at the house so that they could know what needed to be done and what they would need to help with.  We forgot the transfer board so my dad had to be lifted in order to transfer him from his electric wheelchair to a push wheelchair so that we could get him in the house.  It was a good thing that my uncles and grandpa were there to help out.  The therapist and my two uncles lifted my dad while my grandpa and mom were in charge of transferring the cushion from one chair to the other.  It took quite the effort and my dad said he felt it in his muscles.  They then had to get the wheelchair up the front stairs and it to the house. It was really good to have my dad there to make the decisions as to how he and my mom wanted things to be.  After much talking & measuring decisions were made about what renovations should be made and to be honest it is a little more than what we all expected, but it was good to find out now rather than later.  It is a bit overwhelming, especially for my mom, to think about all that needs to be rearranged, gone through, and organized just to get ready for construction, but as a family we will help my mom do this so that she doesn't have to do it alone.  We are so very blessed to have three contractors/builders in our family!!  I can't imagine how other people have to do all of this and have to find the resources on their own.  We are so glad to have the resources and help right in our family!!  Terren built my parent's house so he knows the structure pretty well and what can and can't be done during renovation. Between the three of them they will be able to come up with the best solutions.

Here are some pictures from the field trip to my parent's house:

Made it in the house!!

 

 All ready to go back to the hospital.

 

 

While my dad traveled back to the hospital I went with my mom to take care of some business stuff for my dad.  After that we finally ate lunch around 4:30pm and then headed back over to the hospital.

 

My dad had three bike buddies come visit (I am sorry I forgot your names!).  It was good to see them talking with my dad and laughing about old times and talking about the church, etc.  We tried to convince them that they needed to write some stories for the blog so hopefully they will.  Thanks for coming to visit our dad, he really enjoys his visits with his friends and family!

 

Dinner came and it was chicken salad with bleu cheese dressing and a wheat roll.  My mom fed my dad and he thought it tasted pretty good.  He said he felt hungry which is great!

 

Tonight the hospital had a special guest speaker, Chad Hymus (http://www.chadhymas.com/), and all of the therapists recommended that my dad attend.  Chad is from Tooele and he sustained a spinal cord injury 14 years ago leaving him paralyzed.  Chad travels all around the world giving speeches.  Everyone at the hospital told us it was way easy to get from building 5 to building 1 to listen to Chad and all we had to do to get there was go to floor 1 and head south.  The plan for me was to go with my mom to get my dad settled and then leave, but it wasn't quite as easy as we expected it to be and it got a little frustrating.  After asking for directions it was determined that we had to go outside in order to get to building 1.  When outside we still didn't know what sidewalk would take us where we wanted to go so I had to do a little "pre-scouting" to see what path to take before having my dad travel in that direction..  My dad had never driven his wheelchair more than a few minutes and the drive to building 1 was really hurting his arm and wrist and he had to keep repositioning. My dad had his wheelchair on the lowest speed because it made my mom and I feel more comfortable, but it was really bothering him and he said he felt like a puppy dog following behind.  I then turned around to face him, patted my leg and said "come on, come on" in a high pitched voice.  My dad crossed his eyes and stuck his tongue out at me showing his distaste in my teasing him.  By the time we got to where Chad was speaking my dad was extremely tired and needed to take a little nap before the presentation started.  Given the circumstances we decided it would be best if I stayed for the presentation so that I could help my mom and dad back to building 5 when it was over.

 

I am glad that I stayed for the presentation.  Chad talked to us about bridging the gap between survivor and caregiver, change, family comes first, finding the answer to "why am I here?" and bunch of other motivational advice.  At the beginning of the presentation Chad asked for caregiver volunteers and the crowd wasn't responding so I raised my hand and said that I would help. He had one other lady and I put a small 8oz bottle of water on the ground and then he told us to take a drink out of it.  We did what any other normally abled person would do, we bent down picked up the bottle, twisted off the lid, took a drink, put the lid back on and placed it back on the ground.  He then asked us to take a drink without using our hands or fingers.  My first thought was to ask someone to help me so I asked him if I could ask someone else and all he said to me was you can't use your hands.  I then decided to ask a complete stranger who was right next to me if she could help me get a drink and she was refusing to help me as if she would get in trouble for helping...it was a bit frustrating!  The other lady who was trying to do this with me then uttered the words "I CAN'T!" and that was exactly what Chad was looking for to happen.

 

He then explained that as caregivers we shouldn't get upset and be pushy when a survivor says that they can't do something.  Even though the caregiver may see a million ways a task can be done the survivor doesn't really feel that way at the moment. Compassion and understanding for the frustrations that survivors go through was the point that was being made during this activity.  But after that Chad said to us, "take a drink".  I obviously couldn't depend on someone else to help so I had to use my brain.  I picked up the bottle with my teeth, used my wrists to help me untwist the cap with my teeth, spit the lid out on the ground and then took several drinks of water and set the bottle down on the ground with my teeth.  Chad praised me for doing such a good job and then the other lady decided to take my approach as well.  I was so proud of myself!!  I would have never felt that if someone else helped me.

 

But, then he said "your not done the lid is still off".  I was thinking to myself wow, I guess I am going to have to put my mouth on the floor, pick up the lid turn it the right way in my mouth....and as I was thinking this he told us to wait.  He said that he wanted the lid back on but that we couldn't do it for ourselves.  Well, if I can't do it for myself then I have to have someone else do it for me.  None of the people who were close around me, people I could touch, came to my aid.  A lady from three rows behind me came to help me put the lid back on the water bottle and then touched me on the shoulder and said, "there you go".  In front of everyone I started crying.  Why was I crying? I didn't even really know for sure and now other people were starting to cry.  I think we all had our own insights, but mine came as a deep appreciation of gratitude for the complete stranger who decided to rise above everyone else and care enough to help me.  Also, when Chad told me that I couldn't do it myself I felt small and insignificant, I may not have my hands and fingers but I am still smart and I probably could have figured it out.

 

I was able to feel tonight a small amount of feelings that both survivors and caregivers have.  The message I received is that both survivor and caregiver(s) will need to change they way they think about things.  They also both need to have the chance to serve.  Service is the key!  Even though the survivor may be able to do something on his own, he can help the caregivers by allowing them to help. And the caregivers in turn need to allow the survivors to choose when they want to be independent and when they are ok with help.

 

Because I volunteered to help I was given a free signed copy of Chad Hymas' book and I look forward to reading it with my dad.  Overall the presentation that was given was uplifting and motivating - Chad did his job.  Our dad is also doing his job as he is already uplifting and motivating people, he is finding a way to serve others in his current situation and that is truly amazing!!

 

It was very dark out when the presentation had ended and I was glad to be there to help my mom get my dad back safely to his hospital room. Dad was tired and anxious to get back to his room and increased the speed on his wheelchair so now my mom and I were fast walking to keep up with him.  This made my mom very nervous as she pleaded for him to slow down, but he wasn't going to listen this time.  After barely avoiding some gravel and some disagreements about how fast my dad should go, a stressed Annette and tired Jeff made it back to his hospital room.  I had to laugh to myself as I thought of what had taken place. The event wasn't new to the three of us at all, the only difference was that instead of my dad driving his truck he was driving a wheelchair.  That really was the only difference, my dad has not changed and neither have we.  However, if we take the advice from Chad Hymas, we will all learn to change for each other so that we can be happier and this will in turn help us all avoid small disagreements like how fast or how slow my dad should drive.  It took Chad & his family several, several years to learn this and master it and as I told my mom last night, our family can get there it will just take time.  One year from now things will be better and five years from then things will be even better.  It's all going to take time and we will have to learn to be patient with ourselves and with each other.

Once in the hospital room my mom and I used the hoist to get my dad out of the chair and in to the bed, took off his leg wraps, undressed him to get ready for bed, put on the calf muscle wraps that prevent blood clots, put on his "boots" to prevent foot drop, covered him with his bed sheet, fed him a cookie (because he said he was hungry), got him water for the night & then finally brushed his teeth.  It was quite the workout for all three of us.  Today has really opened my eyes to how much my mom really does to care for my dad.  Most of what she does nurses should be doing, but she does it because she wants it done right and at the right time.  My dad is so blessed to have someone like my mom caring for him everyday!  Its tough being a survivor, but it is also just as tough being a caregiver  If you think about it, both survivor and caregiver need the same amount of help from others willing to give it.  I am grateful to have the opportunity to help both my dad and my mom.  A special thanks goes out to my husband Zach for understanding that I was needed at the hospital and for taking care of our two young girls by himself so that I could help my dad & mom.

I will close by leaving you with another funny story:
My dad is extremely worried about someone, a bystander, getting hurt by his electric wheelchair.  He would prefer that we don't walk right next to him when he is driving because he doesn't want to accidently hurt us.  Well, with that being said,  the hospital room is pretty small and there isn't a whole lot of room to turn around the electric wheelchair so I was trying to just move the controls and get it to back up in the right place but wasn't having any success.  My dad then told me he wanted me to get in the chair and drive it because I would be safer and wouldn't get ran over by the chair on accident.  So I got in the chair and lets just say it was not any safer!!  Maybe safer for me, but not for my dad or mom or the furniture in the room.  I couldn't get the chair to do what I wanted to and I was getting frustrated.  Long story short, I ended up dragging my dad's bed controls with me and ramming into a chair and chest of drawers.  I cannot drive that thing!!!  I gave up pretty quickly and my mom finally got it parked.  I am very glad my dad knows how to drive it because if I had to drive one of those electric chairs it would take me a very long time to learn how to work it and to not hurt others or furniture. LOL!!